With summer now over, you would think things will change drastically. But in many ways they will stay the same. Obviously, the coming and going of Labor Day means that pretty soon we will no longer be wearing shorts, but will instead be bundling up with mittens and scarves and comfy jackets. Of course, you might be thinking that, with the recent arrival of autumn, things will become peaceful and nostalgic as we move into a season of holidays spent with families, evenings curled up on the couch with a good book and seasonal treats like overpriced baked goods made with pumpkin and cinnamon.
To which I can only wonder, what city do you live in?
Whereas summer is typified by the stress of not being the only lameass spending weekends in town sweltering every time you step outside and cringing as you envision your ConEdison bill eating up your retirement savings every time you go home, the coming of autumn brings a whole new set of things to worry about.
Sure, you don’t have to lie to your friends and tell them you spent the weekend in the Hamptons when really you were at your Uncle Ira’s cottage in Delaware as your entire extended family crammed themselves into a two-bedroom shack. And yes, there’s no more envy as you look at your friends’ Facebook photo albums of trips to the South of France while you curse that $30 fee from Chase for overdrawing your account. Again.
But it’s fall. And that means you have to go upstate to look at the changing of the leaves in some boring New England town that you couldn’t care less about. Before they have changed and it’s too late. And it means you have to listen to people get really excited about the forty-seven varieties of hot chocolate they serve every October at City Bakery. And people will be posting Facebook photo albums of their trips to warmer places as they escape the cold while your boss gives you a guilt trip every time you have to leave work five minutes early to go to the dentist.
There’s no escape. Even in September, which should be renamed the Month of One-Thousand Jewish Holidays. Take Yom Kippur. It’s when Jews fast to atone for their sins. Do you know about this holiday? It’s like a bunch of Jews got together, scoffed at the whole idea of Catholic guilt, and said, Ha. That’s nothing. We’re Jews. We’ll show you what guilt is. But enjoy your little confessionals and Hail Marys. They’re cute.
Happy autumn, my little basket cases.
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You can stream this week’s edition of the podcast here and at SelfAbsorbed.me, and subscribe in iTunes.
As always, we thank you for your support. And please help to spread the word by telling your friends, family and other loved ones about the show.
To which I can only wonder, what city do you live in?
Whereas summer is typified by the stress of not being the only lameass spending weekends in town sweltering every time you step outside and cringing as you envision your ConEdison bill eating up your retirement savings every time you go home, the coming of autumn brings a whole new set of things to worry about.
Sure, you don’t have to lie to your friends and tell them you spent the weekend in the Hamptons when really you were at your Uncle Ira’s cottage in Delaware as your entire extended family crammed themselves into a two-bedroom shack. And yes, there’s no more envy as you look at your friends’ Facebook photo albums of trips to the South of France while you curse that $30 fee from Chase for overdrawing your account. Again.
But it’s fall. And that means you have to go upstate to look at the changing of the leaves in some boring New England town that you couldn’t care less about. Before they have changed and it’s too late. And it means you have to listen to people get really excited about the forty-seven varieties of hot chocolate they serve every October at City Bakery. And people will be posting Facebook photo albums of their trips to warmer places as they escape the cold while your boss gives you a guilt trip every time you have to leave work five minutes early to go to the dentist.
There’s no escape. Even in September, which should be renamed the Month of One-Thousand Jewish Holidays. Take Yom Kippur. It’s when Jews fast to atone for their sins. Do you know about this holiday? It’s like a bunch of Jews got together, scoffed at the whole idea of Catholic guilt, and said, Ha. That’s nothing. We’re Jews. We’ll show you what guilt is. But enjoy your little confessionals and Hail Marys. They’re cute.
Happy autumn, my little basket cases.
***********
You can stream this week’s edition of the podcast here and at SelfAbsorbed.me, and subscribe in iTunes.
As always, we thank you for your support. And please help to spread the word by telling your friends, family and other loved ones about the show.
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